In the end, it doesn’t really matter
“What shall I get my adorable 6 year old friend for Christmas? What about the sweet 1O year old girl?” Yes, looking for suitable gifts was part of my hustle and bustle during the Christmas season. And guess what! I bought quite a number of very cute little gifts for my little friends about a month before Christmas only to find that the plastic bag full of the presents had disappeared a week before Christmas! My family had been busy giving my home a new look – rearranging and clearing. I can only say that my presents are hidden in some dark corner of my house or they have been cleared away! And cleared away means inside the garbage bin! My mom even went through the rubbish outside but could not find it…Perhaps it had been taken away by the garbage truck alreadyL
My initial reaction was to get angry with myself for not placing it in a safe place. Then I went on to get angry with the others in my house because I told them not to touch my ‘area’, and that I would clear my territory the next day as I was busy with other things, but they just could not wait. After that, the very consoling word which makes accepting things like this a whole deal easier – fate, or ‘takdir,’or ‘nasib’ in Malay. Maybe the kids were destined not to receive the gifts:P (how meanL) or maybe the gifts were not that suitable and I should get something better. I admit that I bought those gifts in a hurry but they were indeed cute and attractive… But what a waste of the gifts that I boughtL. And it’s not like I’m earning. But I loved them more than those paper notes and jingling coins.
I never found the gifts despite searching every reachable part of my house, and I ended up buying new presents for the little ones. This time, I choose the gifts with more thought of the individual child’s liking, especially for the 2 children who are like my very own siblings. And the reward I got from their faces is among my best moments of my life! The little boy said that he had asked his dad to buy it for him before, but his dad refused him at that time. Now he has it as a gift. And the little girl was elated because my gift matched her new clothes and shoes.
And I got a few totally unexpected gifts this Christmas! They really made me happy. When I say, really happy, I really mean it. I was frustrated about so many things and feeling rather down, and everything seemed to be deliberately going against me. I got scolding almost every time I said innocently asked for clarification or gave my opinion. Somehow, those unexpected gifts gave me a reason to smile when I remembered them in the midst of all my frustrations, unknowing to those angelic givers. Sometimes, little things go a long way, don’t they?:)
I realized something along the way which made me feel bad…my gaze was shifting away from the true gift of Christmas, Jesus Christ, to petty things like lost presents. But when I refocused on that Greatest Gift of all, I felt good on the inside to realize that when I felt frustrated, I was just being human, being a creature of emotion. But in the end, all those frustrations don’t matter after all.
My initial reaction was to get angry with myself for not placing it in a safe place. Then I went on to get angry with the others in my house because I told them not to touch my ‘area’, and that I would clear my territory the next day as I was busy with other things, but they just could not wait. After that, the very consoling word which makes accepting things like this a whole deal easier – fate, or ‘takdir,’or ‘nasib’ in Malay. Maybe the kids were destined not to receive the gifts:P (how meanL) or maybe the gifts were not that suitable and I should get something better. I admit that I bought those gifts in a hurry but they were indeed cute and attractive… But what a waste of the gifts that I boughtL. And it’s not like I’m earning. But I loved them more than those paper notes and jingling coins.
I never found the gifts despite searching every reachable part of my house, and I ended up buying new presents for the little ones. This time, I choose the gifts with more thought of the individual child’s liking, especially for the 2 children who are like my very own siblings. And the reward I got from their faces is among my best moments of my life! The little boy said that he had asked his dad to buy it for him before, but his dad refused him at that time. Now he has it as a gift. And the little girl was elated because my gift matched her new clothes and shoes.
And I got a few totally unexpected gifts this Christmas! They really made me happy. When I say, really happy, I really mean it. I was frustrated about so many things and feeling rather down, and everything seemed to be deliberately going against me. I got scolding almost every time I said innocently asked for clarification or gave my opinion. Somehow, those unexpected gifts gave me a reason to smile when I remembered them in the midst of all my frustrations, unknowing to those angelic givers. Sometimes, little things go a long way, don’t they?:)
I realized something along the way which made me feel bad…my gaze was shifting away from the true gift of Christmas, Jesus Christ, to petty things like lost presents. But when I refocused on that Greatest Gift of all, I felt good on the inside to realize that when I felt frustrated, I was just being human, being a creature of emotion. But in the end, all those frustrations don’t matter after all.
posted by JJ at 6:48 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home