Of Love and Might (Part 5)

Note: This is the final part of this article. The preceeding parts are Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4)

Of love and might, which would you chose?

After pondering over it, I came to a decision that I would follow in the footsteps of my favourite character in the movie, Father Gabriel.

Father Gabriel set out on his mission to the native people, in love. He shared with them the love of Christ. He guided them how to show love. He guided Mondeza in love. The natives showed Mondeza love by forgiving him despite his injustice to their people when he was a slave-trader. Mondeza in return showed them love by being their priest. The Jesuit mission was a mission of love and to resort to bloodshed and violence would contradict the very reason of their being.

Jesus Christ demonstrated love on the Cross, and throughout history, nonviolent resistance has proven to be achieve its objective of freedom. It is undeniable that countless innocent people, including Father Gabriel and the Indians, suffered and even perished as oppressors brutally killed these unarmed freedom fighters. But ultimately, the goal was attained. Remarkable people like Mahatma Ghandi and Martin Luther King, Jr. have led their people to freedom through non-violent resistance. Even great people like the Reformer, Martin Luther and the Bible translator, William Tyndale let in light during the times of the dark Middle Age without force.

I do realize that Mondeza was also displaying his strong love for the native people and his desire to see them free from oppression by leading them in the fight, and ultimately paying for his love with his life. He was a selfless warrior to the people and I am in no position to say that he was wrong in resolving to might.

In the end, both the priests, together with Indians, died in their fight for freedom; one armed with only love and a strong spirit, the other with might, his own way of love. Either way, bloodshed was not averted…leaving only a handful of survivors.

One difference I note in the fight is that those people who fought with might killed, and were killed. On the other hand, those who resisted in love died without their hands being stained by neither the blood of others nor the guilt of taking another life.

While I understand that “all’s fair in love and war”, if you ask me, I would rather hold on to the words expressed by Mondeza himself when he first decided to serve as a priest:

“Though I have all faith so that I could remove mountains and have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor and though I give my body to be burned and have not love, it profiteth me nothing. Love suffereth and love is kind. Love envieth not. Love vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up. When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child. But when I became a man, I put away childish things. But now abideth faith, hope, love... these three. But the greatest of these is love.” (actually taken from 1 Corinthians 13 in the Bible)

And I certainly share the sentiments of Father Gabriel (as I mentioned in my opening lines) in saying “If might is right, then love has no place in the world. It may be so, it may be so. But I don't have the strength to live in a world like that…”

Of love and might, which would you choose?
*Do feel free to post your comments. Thank you:).


*J.J. -23rd September 2005,12.50am, Sunday

Of Love and Might (Part 4)

I was reminded of the various questions that posed as serious dilemmas in one of my favorite courses in university – Ethics- as I watched the Jesuits struggle with decision making in those bleak hours. Should we hold on to the “utilitarian view” which tells us to make a decision that would produce the greatest good for the greatest number, or should we follow the “ethics of care” which tell us to make a decision that will save those whom we care about? Or “Kantian rule” rule that bids us to follow a maxim such as ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you” or “love your enemies”? There are so many views which hold various bases for moral rights and being in the shoes of the Jesuits is not an easy one.

The Jesuits were torn between their love for the people they had ministered to, and their obedience and loyalty towards those in authority, besides their vows as priests. They had to make a choice. Neither of the priests, who had reached thus far, desired to see the beloved natives sold into slavery. Therefore, they stayed back with the people in the forest despite warnings of being ex-communicated. Mendoza broke his vows and organized the natives to resist while Gabriel chose the non-violent approach to help them as a priest.

While watching and even after the movie was over, one question troubled my mind: what would you do if you were in their shoes?

Of Love and Might (Part 3)

Altamirano came into realization at a time when irreversible damage had been made and so many innocent lives paid the price for his decision. He then expressed his regret, almost in tears, which is shown in the final few minutes of the movie. At least, he regretted. One of the other men, a major influencer of the decision, seemed to be heartless and egoistic beyond description and even held Altamirano wholly accountable for the decision. Their own words picture that moment best:

Altamirano: [to Cabeza and Hontar] And you have the effrontery to tell me that this slaughter was necessary?
Hontar: We must work in the world, your eminence. The world is thus.
Altamirano: No, Señor Hontar. Thus have we made the world... thus have I made it.
[Last Lines] Altamirano: So, your Holiness, now your priests are dead, and I am left alive. But in truth it is I who am dead, and they who live. For as always, your Holiness, the spirit of the dead will survive in the memory of the living.

Even though the setting of the movie is one of those from the past, nevertheless the truths in that situation sting as real and painful today. Many people in power still use “the will of God” to make decisions that leave them as comfortable as possible; to make decisions that benefit them the most regardless of the cost to others. To say that ‘the world is thus’ is one of the easiest ways to shirk all responsibilities for actions. The love towards others is missing. It is saddening to see that people can be so hard-hearted towards the suffering they impose upon fellow human beings while enjoying their comfort without remorse of their decisions and actions. Some live in denial and say that they did not have a choice or pretend that they do not see the consequences. Sadly, many only realize the grave consequences of their selfishness and mistakes when it is too late to make amends. Even worse is that some do not even have a conscience when they see wickedness all around.

Of Love and Might (Part 2)

The lives of the sacrificial Jesuits who abandoned their comfort zones to share the Good News to a community that had rejected the Gospel in the past and martyred the first missionary there by fastening him to a cross and letting him drift away through the violent rapids and into to falls, to his doom, really touched my heart.

While observing the pains of these loving missionaries ascend the mountains of Brazil to share Christ’s love to the natives and successfully bring about a golden age among them, I found it difficult to sink in the audacity of people with political power (like Altamirano) to use the name of the Lord while consciously knowing that the decision they are making against the marginalized people of simple faith, is of their own will. This can be illustrated in the in the dialogue below.

Altamirano: Tell them they must leave the missions. They must submit to the will of God. Gabriel: They say it was the will of God that they came out of the jungle and built the mission. They don't understand why God has changed his mind.

(Father Gabriel was translating the words of Altamirano to the native in their own language. I just cannot imagine the pain in his heart as he translated those devastating words to poor people who had trusted him so much. While I understand the pressure faced by Altamirano by powerful forces, the political dilemma which he was in and how much his conscience must have troubled him, he very well knew where his decision would lead – the slavery of the natives and ultimately their doom. He was not willing to choose otherwise; the path less traveled by.)

Of Love and Might (Part 1)

Note: This article consists of Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 and Part 5 - beginning from PArt 1 (this one). The reason why I had to break it up is because of space limitations.)

“If might is right, then love has no place in the world. It may be so, it may be so. But I don't have the strength to live in a world like that, Rodrigo.”

The words of Father Gabriel to Rodrigo Mendoza as the latter wanted to renounce his vows as a priest, are still ringing in my ears while the intensity of the situation plays vividly in my mind.

Last Wednesday, I was very privileged to watch a movie that was an Oscar winner in 1987 besides being a nominee for several other awards. The Mission – regarded by many as one of the greatest Catholic-themed feature films ever made. I had only heard of the movie through one my little students who watched it recently, and I never expected to watch that touching movie just a few weeks later without personally seeking it. I watched the VCD together with the Young Adults cell members and every moment of the movie had my undivided attention.

The movie was so rich in memorable quotes that I made it a point to search for them online. In my search, I also came across a plot summary which gives a good overview of the movie, and would like to share it with you.

“The Mission is the story of how Spain and Portugal carved up Latin America in the eighteenth century. It is also the story of how the original spiritual intention of converting the heathen was subverted to commercial ends when the Jesuit missions in the rainforest were destroyed to allow commerce to take over. Jeremy Irons plays Gabriel, an idealistic Jesuit who has founded a Utopian community among the Indians of the rain forest. De Niro plays Mendoza, a former slaver and mercenary. Mendoza kills his brother in a fit of rage in a duel, and only Fr. Gabriel's guidance prevents his suicide. Gabriel brings Mendoza to work at his mission with the natives, and Mendoza finds peace and asks to become a priest. The church, under pressure, cedes the land to the Portuguese which will allow slavers in again. When it becomes apparent that the mission cannot survive, these two men take different approaches to the problem. Gabriel puts his faith in prayer and cannot believe that his new oppressors will attack the mission; Mendoza reverts to his old ways and forms some of the Indians into a guerilla group, this time fighting for the Lord. Neither of them is proved right. Both men are killed, the mission is overrun, and the Indians are massacred.” Dougan, pages 180-181(http://www.adherents.com/people)

As I Look Back (Part 2)

Coming back to me, these ‘bullies’ never had problems getting me into captivity as all they had to do was to gently ask me to take my place, and I would quietly obey, like a lamb to the slaughter. They would always free me like gentlemen, unharmed, as soon as the sun shone directly into my classroom; when more students started to arrive and when the bell would go off anytime. (Honestly,I really can’t fully understand the nature of the whole situation! But maybe they were nice ‘bullies’ to me because I was ‘nice’ to them. I don’t know.)

In my captivity, I had a lot of time think. And come to think of it, I actually possessed a very positive attitude even at that tender age. I would just stand there, watching the notorious ‘leader’ who even teachers could not handle, and realize that it was not that bad after all being in there…I used that time to pray, and I didn’t hate them ( I have my wonderful parents’ guidance and teachings about love and God to thank:). My initial fears soon turned to a routine that did not bother me much. Although I didn’t enjoy being held captive in the dark, with not much space to move, I stopped fearing it. And I continued to pray for them to just leave me alone or to change my method of ‘bullying’. Many times I would politely request freedom, but they would assure me that being ‘in there’ was just for a little while and that there was no reason for me to kick up a fuss.

Of love and might…might was definitely out of the question! :P

While I was behind those closed doors, I would think of all the things that I had heard about this ‘bully’; that he was a Malaysian Indian and British hybrid and had just arrived in Malaysia from England, and that he had difficulties adjusting to the new environment, besides facing family problems. “Maybe this is why he is so naughty? Maybe he needs a little bit more care and attention?” (must have picked this up from my parents’ conversation :p) I would think to myself. And I would pray for God to help him adapt himself in our foreign land and overcome all his problems. Occasionally, I would even ask my mom to give me a few extra packet drinks for recess to share with these boys, besides my friends. These ‘bullies’ soon started being nicer to me and shared their colour pencils – a 36 piece set- a luxury!( Praise the Lord!) – with my friends and me…and the “leader” made it an order that we utilized it. In fact, this big ‘bully’ had a very soft side which could be noticed when he saw any of our classmates in trouble. He would speak up for the fearful innocent children to teachers when they got scoldings they didn’t deserve. And if any children from different classes were rude to us or attempted to bully us, he would be our superhero to the rescue. In that sense, he protected us. He was also very generous in sharing with the class, all the academic magazines he bought daily.

(By the way, no one dared disobey his orders! Even kind orders! Because if caught not making use of his kindness, he would withdraw his kindness permanently. Looking back, I am very amazed by the authority he commanded and the how much he was hated, well loved and followed by many, all at the same time – he possessed some of the characteristics of a charismatic as well as directive leader in the making, to a certain extent. When I studied that particular chapter in my Leadership course, I couldn’t help but think of him. I’m sure he would make a great leader if nurtured in the right environment to sharpen those skills.)

Soon after that, the miracle took place! One morning, as I was about to be ushered into my “non-torturous cell,” a few little boys came running behind the ‘leader’. They were begging him to let them have my place! They pushed the cupboards further apart to make room for 3 children at one go, and asked if I was willing to give up my turn!!! These boys poured out their grievances to the “leader,” saying that he was being unfair in allowing only one person the privilege of that so called ‘spaceship’ experience for so long!!!

I couldn’t believe my ears and just stood there dumbfounded…The “leader” finally declared, as if he was the king of the world, “I need to be fair. From today onwards, all those who want a chance must line up and take turns.” Looking at me, with a smile across his face, he announced, “Your turn is over. You can go.” And his ‘disciples’ asked me whether I was ok with it! I was more than overjoyed of course! My prayers were finally answered. I still find it very difficult to how comprehend how an instrument of detention could become a ‘spaceship’ experience.( This would open a brand new topic on perspectives.)

And that was the end my early hours behind those overlapped doors. From that day on, it was my turn to watch from the outside, the excitement of those boys queuing up in front of the cupboard, anxiously waiting for their turn before the school bell rang!

I have no idea where this ‘one of a kind’ boy is now. This ‘bully’ left for England by the end of that year itself. Without him in my class, my classroom life in Standard 1 would have most probably been a very quiet one and boring one. Reminiscing, I can only smile and thank the Lord for teaching me to love in such a unique way and for giving me an unforgettable experience to share:).

Of love and might, in my case, love prevailed. To me, at that point of time, might never even crossed my mind. It was not at all an option, due to my physical limitations and my personality. Love was my only way out of my predicament…and it proved worthwhile:)

As I Look Back (Part 1)

Just a few days ago, I was thinking of love and might again…but this time round, in reflections of my own life. I was recollecting the times when I was faced with situations that actually required me to choose between love and might…I wonder if I even realized that I had a choice to make, back then.

In the movie, “The Mission”, might was referred to as physical strength or force. But those of you who have seen me in person would know beyond the shadow of doubt that if I were in the position to choose between love and might, I would digging my own grave were I to choose might. With a tiny frame and being light enough to be blown away by the wind (as my well-built lecturer once said as she held my waist tightly in the strong wind), it would be to my enemy’s greatest advantage if I resolved to might. But as I reflect on experiences in my life, I am referring to ‘might’ on a lighter basis.

I remember when I was about 7 years old, naturally I used to be very much smaller than I am now. My school van used to leave me at school around 6.45 am when school started at 7.45am. I didn’t have any other means of transportation to school. Being one of the few earliest children in class, I was very vulnerable to being ‘bullied’ by the thin, but tall, and much feared boy of Caucasion blood in my class. He was one of those boys that all the other boys wanted to ‘belong’ to. They just found it such a privilege to be accepted by him- to be called his follower…To help him ‘bully’ others and even found it an honour to be ‘bullied’ by him.

‘Bully,’ I say, instead of bully, because this fearsome guy was not that bad after all, and his actions towards me were not actually severely harmful to any degree. (God’s protection? – must be:) ) But being a tiny kid facing a Goliath, he sure seemed huge and intimidating. Every morning as soon as I left my bag on my chair, he would order me to go and stand in between two adjacent cupboards (the little area where we usually prop the broom and dustpan in classrooms) while he would open wide the doors of both cupboards, overlap them to close me in my little space and push a stick in between the handles of those doors to keep me ‘imprisoned’. I was not suffocating or anything like that, as the cupboard doors had a millions tiny holes, as in a cream-cracker biscuit, that allowed me breathe and watch him and his followers leave the classroom to roam the school before the teachers arrived.

(As far as I remember, a few other children were asked to clean the class every single day before the teachers came in regardless of whose turn it was to do the chores on the duty roster. This ‘bully’ also commanded one very timid boy, who had glasses like Harry Porter’s, to clean my class’ drain and keep the surroundings of my class clean – spotless to be exact. He was strictly forbidden from picking up any rubbish belonging to next classes. If this ‘bully’ found any rubbish at all, he would call the timid boy and made sure that he picked it up. Anyone caught littering would face the same consequences. (As a matter of fact, I think all of us early kid were ‘bullied’ in one way or another – mine was most probably the most relaxing one. I always thought that I would have been better off cleaning the class.) Not surprisingly, my class got 1st place for cleanliness. Pretty soon, this ‘bully’ was made Assistant Monitor in class and even the Monitor feared him!)

(You might be wondering why nobody seemed to complain to teachers. Well, it’s because based on experience; we all knew that it was pointless. Many had complained before but there was nothing the teachers could do to tame him. Once he took a permanent marker pen and scribbled on my while sleeve. He did the same to my friend who was beside me. When we complained to our teacher, he just shrugged his shoulders saying that we were kicking up a fuss for nothing and that he was only testing the marker to see if it had ink! Before the teacher could begin her lecture, he just picked up a pencil from the teacher’s desk and vigorously scribbled on his own white sleeve. Then he looked at the 3 of us and asked ,”Are you happy now?” and walked back to his desk, cool and calm – earning the applause of his followers, leaving the teacher looking helpless. She commanded him to come back but he said he felt he had enough of class for the day. He just packed his stuff, grabbed his school bag and out he went, roaming the school –summoning a futile school-wide chase for him. He made his grand reappearance hours later, just minutes before it was time to go home! And home he went – scot-free!)

My Best, My Worst and the Rest

Won't You, Lord
Take the best of me
Keep me thankful and humble
With Your gifts that make me good.
Won't You, Lord
Take the rest of me
Help me recognize and learn
Whatever you know I should.
Won't You, Lord
Take the worst of me
Cleanse me and make me whole
Strengthen me and guard my heart with your Truth.

These words came to me as I was playing the guitar with the limited musical knowledge and skills that I have. These words just seemed to rush into mind and I just left my guitar on the bed and grabbed a pen and piece of paper. (From experience, postponing putting my thoughts on paper made them vanish altogether.) My sister was puzzled by my abrupt actions and demanded an explanation. Upon completion of transferring my thoughts to paper, my explanation led to discussion of the gifts God has given us and how to discover and utilize it for His glory. This resulted in my sister turning half of another poem of mine (the next one: With Faith) into a song. And it turned out pretty nice, with her very sweet voice.